Sunday, May 28, 2006

Vomitus Humongous...


Puke. Vomit. Blow chunks. Yup. That's what my weekend has been filled with. My poor sweet Ethan has been afflicted with...well...I don't know what he has. But it makes him spew. Which, in turn, makes me want to join him. ESPECIALLY when the projectile vomit lands ALL OVER ME!

It's a really strange thing, though. He is as happy as a clam until about 20 seconds before he throws up. In that 20 seconds he cries. And then the puke. It's crazy how such a small child can produce THAT much throw up. And as soon as he's done- he's back to his happy self. I told my mom that I think he has baby bulemia. She didn't think it was funny. I guess she's right. Bulemia is no laughing matter. But he wasn't keeping anything down, until I gave him some delicious Pedialyte.

This whole throw up fiasco started when my gentleman friend was here (I really was going to tell him how I felt...). But the frantic cleaning of bodily fluids and changing Ethan's clothes, and my clothes, kind of killed that one. So needless to say, I chickened out. I wanted to be looking pretty good, and NOT smelling like bile.

Also? Ethan threw up on my friend's 2 month old sons head. He has impecable aim. No joke.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Feels like Junior High...

Remember when you were in junior high? Remember what it was like to have a crush on someone? Remember how you would talk to your girlfriends, saying things like, "He's so cute! Did he just look at me?? I wonder if he likes me too? Should I tell him? AHH! I can't stop thinking about him! He's stuck in my head! I think I might really like him. I think I might love him. What do I do? " And then do you remember how you'd have that same conversation with your friends over and over for what seems like forever? And then you FINALLY get the nerve to tell him? And half the time he's receptive, and the other half of the time he "just likes you as a friend"? No? This is just how my love life has worked since the 6th grade? Except that this system has never *really* worked that well.

And yet? I find myself in that situation again. I totally have a crush on one of my friends. And I have since I met him 2 years ago. We talk about stuff. Stuff that matters. OUr friendship isn't based on what most of my friendships are based on right now. Most of my friends- the biggest thing we have in common are that we are in the military and have kids. Don't get me wrong- if it weren't for these friends I think I would probably be in a looney bin by now. But when I hang out with them and their husbands and their kids- I sometimes feel incredibly alone. To the point where I'll sit and have a whole conversation with Ethan, because everyone else is talking about their husbands and such. And I can't even relate.

Back to my crush- he's my go to guy. When I need a date for a wedding- I call him. He's a snappy dresser and always smells good. When I need a dance partner for salsa lessons? I call him. The man can dance. And he doesn't freak out over the fact that I've been dancing for years. We dance and we have fun. When I just need to vent? I call him. When I need a big bear hug? I call him.

Before, when I first met him, I was pregnant and he had just gotten out of a long term relationship and was messing around with a coworker that I was friends with. Timing would have been WAY off if I had said anything about this. Then, I was busy trying to figure out how to be a single mom. And he was busy finishing up school. Well, now, he's about a month from graduation. He's been single for awhile. I know he wants to be in a relationship. And I'm terrified that if I don't say something now. It'll be too late and I'll be stuck beating myself up over "what if."

I finally feel like I'm ready to get back into the dating scene. But I'm overcome with fear of rejection courtesy of an ex boyfriend that got me pregnant and robbed me of my self confidence. I'm not sure I can handle it. I have a plan though. He's going to come over to hang out tomorrow. I'm going tell him. I have to. And if he "just likes me as a friend" I'll cry to my blog. And try to move on. And probably cry a little more.

Wish me luck.

Monday, May 08, 2006

Only a slight twitch...

I made it through last week and only had a slight twitch on friday! Having the three kids to look after was...uh...fun...yeah. That's it. No, actually it wasn't that bad. The 2.5 year old was pretty easy most of the time. And the 9 month old is probably the 2nd happiest baby on the face of the planet (Ethan is the happiest). It got a little hairy at bed time, since all of the kids wanted to snuggle but none of them wanted to share me....

I'm not a yeller. Most of the time I just don't think it's necessary. And even when Bella- the oldest one I was watching- took Ethan's toys from him and pushed him to the ground- I still didn't yell. I barely even raised my voice. I DID use a stern tone. But as soon as I said "Bella" with that tone, she would run to the playroom, screaming and crying, and sit herself in a corner. After she did that a couple of times I just thought I'd see how long she'd stay in there and cry. Turns out? A very long time. Ok. Maybe 10 minutes isn't that long. But when you're not used to having a child throw actual tantrums- it feels like a long time. Ethan doesn't even bother. As soon as he realizes that I'm not going to make a big deal of his flinging himself to the floor he quits and goes back to playing (this usually takes all of 20 seconds)

And poor Ethan. He's not used to sharing his mommy. Even at daycare he was acting all degected. He seemed to relieved on Friday when I picked him up and there were no other kids attached to me.

There were some fun times though...Ethan loves to hug babies, so he spent the whole time trying to smother Jordan with his baby lovin. And Bella liked to hug both, but her hugs kind of knocked the other two over into a pile of baby cuteness.

Oh! Yesterday I was feeding my Mt. Dew habit and Ethan pointed to my can and said "doda?" When I said "yes that is soda" with the emphasis on the S, he then pointed to the TV and said "doda?" and then he pointed to my eyeball (read: poked me in the eye) and said "doda?" So he can't talk yet. He's getting there.